Close the door behind you...

[Tunamate]

I just can't stop laughing, and although it really was not funny at the time, i just felt the need to share the unfolding events of this evening with someone....

Allow me to set the stage:
I am busy with a research assignment which is taking all my time and I am starting to go blind from staring into my PC for hours on end. My wife has taken our 18 month old son and gone with her folks to a dinner which i decided against. This was in order to try and make some kind of a dent in the ever present work load in front of me.

As i sit at my desk drinking more coffee than anyone should be allowed, i feel the tension in my bladder rise to levels i just can no longer contain. Wanting to just get the last paragraph behind me I squeeze my legs and focus on the statement i'm getting across. I feel relief that I am making so much progress on this mammoth task, and i feel the tension in my bladder rise to almost bursting pressures....

Eventually i jump up and run off to the bathroom, relieved that i am making progress on my work and even more relieved that i can empty my VERY full bladder.

Now normal, i would close the door behind me when i enter the bathroom, but I'm "home alone" and didn't feel the need to lock the door. Leaving it wide open, i gazed out the window, pondering my future and the work i was busy with. Overcome by a sense of nostalgia and that sensation one gets when about to unleash a tight and full bladder into the porcelain....

As i drop my head to look down and ensure that my aim is not "off center" i suddenly see that the kitten (my wife got me for Christmas) has jumped up onto the toilet seat and is looking up at me unsuspectingly and all innocent (as only kittens can...
it's too late, i try to stop but there's nothing i can do and Tony get's the full wrath of my suspended bladder unleashed on his small head.
This tidal wave of pressure causes him to looses balance and he promptly falls into the toilet!
This turns innocent and sweet kitten, into a raging clawing and biting demon of destruction who launches out of the loo and straight onto my crotch clambering and clawing himself up, while i desperately try to keep from loosing my equipment to his claws and maintain my aim into the loo and not all over the floor...

Kitten eventually bolts for the door and i am left with tool in my hand, bleeding and covered in pee, desperate to maintain some composure and really glad that no-one else was here to witness my undoing.

So, moral of the story...... Close the door behind you!

[Kreefstert]

WHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHA

[sa-shooter]

[JS4]

[PeaceOfficer]

Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!

[Bokman]

I just laughed so much that my wife came from the bedroom to see what is wrong with me.
I am sure that your wife will feel very sorry for you and maybe give some special attention to the places that hurts. Unfortunately it will not heal your dignity.

[camouflage762]

Eina!

[killzone]

[Bundu Ric]

Excuse the language, but that is fkn hilarious.

[Maroelas]

Hahaha! That is fkn funny dude! Hope you washed the kitten afterwards!