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Thread: On Dying Alone

  1. #1
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    Default On Dying Alone

    I am not sure whether to put this at speaker's corner or at General Discussion, so here goes. Admin, if this thread is in the wrong place please move it.

    I am a trustee in my complex. One of the residents arrived home on the 15th of November 2021, under the influence, crashed her car into a parking canopy pole, parked it in an inappropriate position, then went into her apartment, leaving her purse in the car. This is the last time she was seen by anyone. Ger work colleagues informed us she didn't show up for work, and did not answer phone calls or messages.

    Along with other trustees, I was asked to look into her apartment to see if she was okay. The door was locked, but the lights were on, in the afternoon, as they had been for several days. Nobody answered. Assuming the worst we called the police, who gained access to the property via the balcony door, which was open (another sign that something was wrong). Sadly she was found in the bedroom, dead. It appears to be a suicide.

    Her name was Tebogo. She was a doctor working at Sebokeng Hospital, originally from Botswana where her entire family is (apart from her father, who practices medicine in Johannesburg). A work colleague (who also lives in the complex) came to identify the body. He mentioned she was suffering from mental health problems (possibly depression, although he couldn't say with certainty). She was 26, which is way too young for someone to die alone or contemplate suicide, let alone a doctor who (seemingly) had a bright future ahead of her. Perhaps if someone followed up with her sooner, she would still be alive.

    The sad thing is we all tend to lead solitary lives and keep to ourselves most of the time, so what happened to her could potentially have happened to anyone else in South Africa. If a similar thing happened to us, would there be anyone willing to look in? Even if we are not suicidal (I am not, thankfully), the same thing could happen to one of us who slips on a puddle, hits their head on a counter, and bleeds out on their kitchen floor. Would anyone notice? Would anyone care?

    All I could do was say a prayer for my soul, and contemplate my own mortality. As if the everyday worry of possibly getting hijacked on my way to and from work was bad enough. At least you can EDC and get training for something like that. But there is no preparation for dying like Tebogo did, at least not that I am aware of.

    Anyway, be sure you have at least one family member willing to call or look in in the event of something like this happening. It could mean the difference between life and death.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: On Dying Alone

    How incredibly sad.

  3. #3
    User Paul's Avatar
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    Default Re: On Dying Alone

    Wow! Just wow...
    "Always remember to pillage before you burn"
    Unknown Barbarian

  4. #4
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    Default Re: On Dying Alone

    If she was 26 and a doctor or a doctor to be it would put her in her second year of internship. Unfortunately very little is ever spoken about the harsh reality of studying medicine in this country. The amount of depression as well as the suicide rate is insanely alarming. Unfortunately, the subject is very taboo and no one likes to really talk about it. A lot of doctors or future doctors are unfortunately failed by a system that should be protecting them at all cost. May she RIP.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: On Dying Alone

    Quote Originally Posted by Adie View Post
    If she was 26 and a doctor or a doctor to be it would put her in her second year of internship. Unfortunately very little is ever spoken about the harsh reality of studying medicine in this country. The amount of depression as well as the suicide rate is insanely alarming. Unfortunately, the subject is very taboo and no one likes to really talk about it. A lot of doctors or future doctors are unfortunately failed by a system that should be protecting them at all cost. May she RIP.
    And apparently Veterinarians also. Or in Australia at least where one of my friends who studied the phenomenon lives. Work and study pressure...

  6. #6
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    Default Re: On Dying Alone

    Psychology students also have a high suicide rate apparently. Lost a niece who was in her final year of study.

    We live strange lives nowadays. A friend received a call from his neighbour's wife (she was in hospital with Covid, therefore no visitors) asking him to go and check on her husband as she had not been able to reach him by phone. My friend and another neighbour ended up breaking into the house and found the husband had passed away about two days ago. Cause of death was also Covid.

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